Lazy people need to get their arse in gear, whereas smugglers need to get their gear in arse.
A difficult customer walked into the shop that Jim didn’t want to deal with, so he grabbed a mop and pretended to clean up a mess.
The manager came over and asked him what he was doing. After telling him that he was cleaning, the manager said, “It doesn’t look messy here.”
To which Jim replied, “Why, thank you!”
He says ‘I drive my truck from Hamburg to Liverpool via Holland/Belgium over to the UK and up to Liverpool, drops his load off and back to Hamburg in under 2 days.”
A drunk old scouse man can’t help but hear him and mutters ‘Fuck off lad, I used to pick my load up in Liverpool, drop it off in Hamburg and make it back to Liverpool the same day!’
German man, gives a sarcastic laugh and replies ‘Oh yeah old man, what rig were you driving?’
Old fella replies ‘a fucking Lancaster Bomber!!’
One eye is looking atcha and the other is looking phoria.
I’m so lazy i’ll procrastinate later
I nearly answered him.